If the Baby Jesus is not appeased during this shameless spend-fest, His wrath will be catastrophic

No. 61 –  Christmas Cheer at the Capital: Pandemic Edition

The Save Our Christmas campaign in full force...
The Save Our Christmas campaign in full force...

What are we skinning? The brave and inspiring insistence (pushed by the Valletta Cultural Agency and the tourism ministry) that the coronavirus pandemic will not, in fact, ‘kill Christmas’ this year, and that eager shoppers and revellers will in fact be met with adequate cheer should they pluck up the courage to wade through Valletta this holiday season.

Why are we skinning it? Because it is yet another stark and grimly farcical reminder that our political leaders worldwide have revealed themselves to have the mental fortitude and discipline of sugar-deprived infants, give or take.

How so? Surely everyone deserves a Christmas uplift during such trying times? ‘Christmas uplift’ and ‘encouraging further flirtation with a deadly pandemic for the sake of the economy’ are two entirely different things, wouldn’t you say?

Once you put it like that, yes… But think about all the businesses which traditionally rely on Christmas to tide over the economic quarter and prepare themselves for leaner times. They are suffering: why would you want to plunge the knife deeper by taking any semblance of Christmas away?

I’m surprised Edwin Vassallo hasn’t yet declared COVID-19 to be a Marxist conspiracy, in fact

You know what would plunge the knife even deeper? What?

An even more aggressive wave of COVID infections, one that could potentially lead to yet another lockdown. But the prime minister has excluded any possibility of another lockdown, on advice of the health experts. Do you seriously think he would suggest one right after Christmas.

Just like the virus doesn’t discriminate between age, nationality, political affiliation, those who believe the final season of Game of Thrones was a satisfying closer and those who (Ed: rightly) believe it to be hot garbage… it certainly will not make any concessions for religious holidays. You’re right. The worst of it did hit us around Easter, initially.

Yes. Quite disrespectful of it, I must say. I’m surprised Edwin Vassallo hasn’t yet declared COVID-19 to be a Marxist conspiracy, in fact.

Do say:  “Local businesses certainly deserve a leg-up during this trying time, so we should be understanding of their plight while also, at the same time, acknowledging that the pomp-and-ceremony announcement of a ‘Christmas at the Capital’ against the backdrop of a pandemic remains a jarring, vulgar decision that was mistimed and poorly strategised.”

Don’t say: “If the Baby Jesus is not appeased during the shameless capitalist spend-fest organised in his name, his wrath will be catastrophic. Choose wisely, populace, and let the mechanisms guide you.”

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