[WATCH] Abused by nuns: Victims describe childhood in Gozo orphanage from 'hell'

In the quiet village of Għajnsielem in Gozo, lies a painful chapter etched in the memories of those who once sought refuge at the Lourdes Home orphanage.

During the 1970s and 1980s, behind the facade of care and sanctuary, a harrowing tale of sexual, physical, and psychological abuse unfolded at the orphanage. The horrific experience left deep scars on the innocent souls entrusted to the care of nuns who ran the home.

On a breezy Wednesday morning, one of the victims, Carmen Muscat, welcomed me at her Nadur home, eager to recount her story as child under the care of a “monster”.

Sitting at her dinner table were two other former residents of the home run by the Dominican Sisters – Roseanne Saliba and Mary Borg (Mary’s name has been changed to protect her identity).

The paths of these three adult women crossed in childhood at the Lourdes Home where they suffered abuse at the hands of those who should have cared for them.

Each of these women is clutching thick files filled with newspaper cuttings, photos and documents they collected through the years.

Lourdes Home victim Carmen Muscat

As Carmen hands me a cup of coffee, asking me if I wanted milk or sugar, she explains how traumas of her childhood still torment her to this day.

“I am still traumatised. The beatings, the abuse… they haunt me to this day,” she says, her words casting a sombre shadow over the cheerful and welcoming atmosphere inside her quaint Gozitan home.

‘My life was hell; she was a monster’

She explains how the “nightmare” started when at just six years of age, in the middle of the night, she was removed from another wing of the orphanage, and placed under the care of Sister Josephine Anne Sultana.

Carmen barely finishes her sentence, when Roseanne, a quiet and reserved woman who only looked up to smile and greet us, pitches in.

“My life was hell. She was a monster, a dangerous woman whose actions were consequential. We did not have a normal childhood,” she says, as the room once again falls quiet.

Sister Josephine Anne Sultana (right) was tasked with caring for orphans at Lourdes Home (left) for more than 25 years (Left photo: James Bianchi/MaltaToday)

Roseanne explains how the children would be tasked with chores from the tender age of five.

“She would wake us up at 5:30am, and everyone had a chore they must do before we went to school. Some cooked, others cleaned, but there was one constant – if you made a mistake, you were getting beaten,” Roseanne says. “If you left a small droplet... rest assured you were getting a beating.”

Carmen recounts how the nun would be waiting at the orphanage door for the children to return from school.

“She used to be waiting with wooden ruler or belt in hand. I was young… very young. If I had dust or a small tear on my skirt, she would beat me,” she says. “Homework time was no different. She would patrol the hall, and if she noticed that I or any other child making a mistake, she would grab you from the back of your head and slam it against the desk.”

Sometimes children would bleed from their nose because of the thump.

“If the blood fell onto the copybook, she would force us to copy all our homework onto a new copybook,” Carmen says, looking straight into my eyes with anger and despair. “It was sadistic, it was evil because after all that, I didn’t know what the mistake was.”

Carmen Muscat looks at photos of her younger self (Photo: James Bianchi/MaltaToday)

A simple act of love was not recognised by Sister Josephine, Roseanne says looking back at her childhood.

“Once I was washing the clothes and I remember it was raining. We had two dogs, Snoopy and Lassie. I saw that one of the dogs was wet and cold, and I laid down a piece of cloth for it to lie on,” she says, explaining how the nun flew into a fit of rage when she found out the next morning. “She started shouting and yelling, asking who it was. She struck so much fear in our hearts through the years, that nobody spoke up. Everyone was punished, forcing us to clean the whole orphanage and cancelling our monthly visit to our parents.”

“What did I do wrong? It was a wet and cold dog. What was the reason for punishing us?” she says.

But it got worse with Carmen recounting how Sister Josephine forced the young children to “eat their own vomit” as punishment.

“I did not like to eat when I was a young girl, and I remember the food being so bad that I had to throw up. When I threw up, she would force me to put the vomit back onto the plate and eat it again,” she says. “It would happen weekly, and I sometimes threw up for four, five times, only to be forced to eat it again.”

Roseanne Saliba (Photo: James Bianchi/MaltaToday)

Carmen explains how before dinner time, she would pick an apron which had a pocket on the front, so that she could put a small plastic bag in it where she would secretly stash the vomit. “Obviously I would do it without her knowing, or else… I would get beaten again.”

Children with no name

Physical abuse was the order of the day at Lourdes Home, but beatings would be accompanied by a tirade of psychological abuse directed at the young children.

They detail how, in the main hall, each child had their own designated chair. Affixed to the bottom of each chair was a nickname bestowed upon them by the nun. It wasn't an affectionate moniker but rather a derogatory one.

Sister Josephine seated at the head of the table

“My nickname was ‘the skeleton’,” Carmen says, explaining how she was called names for simply getting a chore wrong.

“I had more than one,” Roseanne pitches in. “Mine were iċcasata, skantata, good for nothing. She would hurl the abuse at us non-stop.”

Mary Borg breaks her silence thus far. She was also picked on by the nun for having glasses.

“If I did something wrong, she would come screaming at me: ‘Are you blind? Go wear your glasses! Are you stupid? Are you dumb?’,” Mary says.

She chooses to speak to me but is uncomfortable showing her face or revealing her identity. The hurt is still evident. She tells me the abuse sticks with her to this day, being unable to show affection and love to people who are close to her.

A young Carmen Muscat at the orphanage (Photo: James Bianchi/MaltaToday)

“I still suffer from anxiety and up until around two years ago, I used to have nightmares about her screaming and abusing me,” Mary says. “I find it difficult to hug my own children, because I find it awkward. Affection was far and few between when I was a child. She destroyed us.”

Forced to masturbate in front of a priest

Sexual abuse was rampant at Lourdes Home, the victims claim, each having their own story to tell about how they were forced into sexual acts by clergy men.

The most horrific and graphic account is Carmen’s. She says that Sister Josephine had once brought a priest to the orphanage to address the fact that Carmen had no boyfriend.

“Sister Josephine brought a priest so that I can experience feelings and be attracted to men. She would take me down alone with the priest in the Bishop’s hall, which is part of Lourdes Home. They would force me to touch myself to get turned on and start having feelings for men,” Carmen recounts. This happened on four separate occasions.

Lourdes Home (Photo: James Bianchi/MaltaToday)

The three women also remember another priest, who is now deceased, who used to be brought in for confession.

“Everyone knew about what he did, and no one took action,” she says. “He would greet you by asking you if you had a boyfriend, whether you had sex with him. You would then look down at his robes, and he would have his penis out. He would start laughing. I would freeze, I hadn’t even seen someone kiss before, let alone be in such a situation.”

This happened every week, the victims say.

“Once I was looking out of the window and suddenly, I felt him groping me from behind. I turned around and told him to stop or I would report him. Deep down I knew I wouldn’t, but it was a last resort,” Roseanne says, on the verge of tears. “Had I had someone I can trust and love, I would have told her, but I kept everything bottled up inside me.”

After sitting down with these women for more than three hours, it is evident that the pain of a stolen childhood has left lasting scars.

They spoke out in the past and after an initial investigation by the Gozo Curia, then administered by the late Bishop Nikol Cauchi, had dismissed their claims, a subsequent investigation by a commission set up by Cardinal Mario Grech in 2006 when he was bishop of Gozo, found that abuse did take place at the orphanage.

Former Gozo bishop and now Cardinal Mario Grech (left) and former Gozo bishop Nikol Cauchi launched separate investigations into the case (Photos: MaltaToday)

The commission’s report was never published but the orphanage was closed down and Grech publicly apologised. The victims do not make much of the apology (see separate story).

The nuns who carried out the abuse and those who turned a blind eye to what was happening did not pay for their actions. The victims feel let down by the church and the system.

They now seek some form of justice and have filed a constitutional case in which they argue their human rights were breached because the State failed in its duty to care for them as vulnerable children.

Details of the abuse they endured have emerged in court testimony the women gave in the first sitting that took place earlier this month as they relive their childhood trauma in the orphanage from hell.

‘Same old, same old…’ – Dominican Sisters

MaltaToday reached out to the Dominican Sisters over the phone asking for a reaction to the stories recounted by the victims.

When I identified myself as a journalist, a nun on the other side of the phone, who refused to identify herself, said she would not comment.

Pressed further, she said it was “all a lie”.

“Same old, same old. They have been repeating the same lie for years,” she said. “God bless you, and goodbye.”

Mother General Carmelita Borg

The nuns had similarly refused to comment back in 2006 when details of the abuse first emerged in TV programme Bondi+ and The Malta Independent on Sunday.

MaltaToday also reached out to the Gozo diocese for the Bishop Anton Teuma’s views on the case.

I received a short reply by email: “The Church in Gozo, condemns any form of abuse whether its physical, verbal, sexual and/or psychological, within the Church community, wherever it may exist. Since a recent constitutional Ccase against the State by victims of the Lourdes Home orphanage, run by another Institution other than the Diocese has been opened, no further comments will be issued, until the ongoing proceedings have been concluded.”

Timeline of events  

1952 – Lourdes Home is opened  

1970/80 – Abuse occurs 

1999 – Allegations surface for the first time by former residents of Lourdes Home 

1999 – Former Bishop Nikol Cauchi opens first inquiry 

1999 – First inquiry is concluded, with former bishop Nikol Cauchi saying allegations of abuse were “unfounded”. Victims of abuse are not told investigation has been closed.  

2006 – Bondi+ reveals inquiry conclusions for the first time. This is also the first time the victims are made aware of the results.  

2006 – Gozo Bishop Mario Grech opens second inquiry. Commission is chaired by retired judge Victor Caruana Colombo. 

2008 – Lourdes home is closed down after commission concludes its findings. 

2008 – Former Gozo Bishop Mario Grech issues public apology to victims of abuse and asks for forgiveness. 

21 May 2011 – Nuns questioned by police over child abuse claims. 

2011 – Sister Josephine Anne Sultana is charged in court. 

4 September 2011 - Lourdes Home Abuse victims petition for change in law. 

2020 – Carmen Muscat asks current Gozo Bishop Anton Teuma to hand over her personal files. He tells her they have been destroyed. 

2021 – Former resident speaks to then Justice Minister Edward Zammit Lewis about the case. 

2021 – Former residents send official letter to the Vatican.  

27 July 2021 – Abuse victims receive letter of acknowledgment from the Vatican. 

6 July 2022 – Carmen Muscat and other victims meet with current Justice Minister Jonathan Attard who recommends they open a constitutional case.  

18 July 2022 – Victims meet with Gozo Dioceses Safeguarding commission. 

2 August 2022 - Gozo Dioceses Safeguarding commission informs victims a report has been filed with the Police Vice Squad. 

27 August 2022 – Victims are called for a meeting with Inspector Kyle Borg. 

29 October 2022 – Victims meet with Dominican Provincial Vince Micallef who told them he does not have anything to do with the case. 

13 February 2022 – In meeting with human rights lawyer Lara Dimitrijevic, victims decide on moving ahead with constitutional case. 

27 June 2023 – Constitutional case is officially registered. 

15 January 2024 – The victims start testifying in the constitutional case.