They told me I could be anything, so I became a Nadur Youngster

What are we skinning? Gozitan construction magnate-cum-enviornmentalist scourge du jour and Hamrun Spartans President Joseph Portelli officially signing on to play with – of all teams – his beloved Nadur Youngsters (whom he was once president of) in a decisive match against Kercem Ajax last Saturday, as ‘Player 99’.

Why are we skinning it? Erm… did you hear what I just said?

I did. Portelli’s free to do that, no? Yes, it’s rather chilling how that seems to be the knee-jerk response of most people with regards to whatever occurs in this country.

How do you mean? The ‘u iva mhux xorta’ attitude towards pretty much anything that goes on - een if it is tacky, indecorous and redolent of a largely anti-social and individualistic approach to public life – is met with a shrug… just water off a duck’s back.

Well okay but… I don’t care about football, why should it affect me? It shouldn’t affect anyone, really, apart from those poor buggers playing for Kercem Ajax, I guess.

So again, why is it even a thing? Well… a grown-ass man who is also one of Malta’s biggest economic movers-and-shakers deciding that he wants to step in and play for the team (he obviously bankrolls given his kid son is now its president) just so he can partly claim credit for them winning a trophy is… a choice.

It’s sweet, though. He’s already got Malta in the palm of his hand… but he really wants that Nadur accolade. You can take the boy out of the (Gozitan) village…

Though of course, it could also be a case of ‘what do you give the man who has everything’... Seems like scoring a ‘decisive’ penalty will do the trick of cheering our Joseph right up.

It’s nice to know that football can still hold on to its reputation as a truly democratic sport. Yes, even the filthy rich are allowed into its ranks with open arms by enthusiastic players and fans.   

Warms the heart, really. I am wiping a single tear off my cheek right now. Promise.

Do say: “While Portelli is of course free to do as he wills with his time, money and resources, we are equally free to put into question the persistent tackiness of a large part of his endeavours.”

Don’t say: “They told me I could be anything, so I became a Nadur Youngster.”