Why ‘Mr Mojo-Jojo’ is the superhero this country really needs, right now

OK, a small word of explanation. This is supposed to be ‘Part Two’, of an article that was meant to appear in last Wednesday’s print edition of MaltaToday.

But alas! At exactly 1.25pm last Tuesday, my hometown of Ta’ Xbiex became the umpteenth victim, of a blackout epidemic that had by then entered its ninth [!] consecutive week... and I was unable to complete the article in time for publication (or even at all, until the electricity came back on well over eight hours later.)

For this reason, ‘Part One’ never actually appeared in print (though you can still read it online). And as there may still be some people out there – very few, I would imagine – who still only read their newspapers in printed form: I’d like to take this opportunity to apologise for missing that Wednesday deadline; and also, for what must now look like a rather incomprehensible ‘sequel-without-a-prequel’.

Right: with that out of the way... let’s just pick up where we left off, shall we?

Some of you (basically, the ones who read the earlier article) may remember that I had specifically asked you to keep a small detail in mind. Namely, the fact that ‘Mr Mojo Jojo’ – the supervillain of a 1990s cartoon called ‘The Powerpuff Girls’ – had been theoretically responsible for the creation of said superheroines: owing to an accident he once caused in Prof. Utonium’s secret laboratory, when still just a ‘chimpanzee lab-assistant’.

Naturally, I won’t bother repeating all the details here; but one important thing I omitted to mention, in Part One, is that this same belated realisation also contributed directly to Mr Mojo Jojo’s downfall, in the end... as a ‘supervillain’.

Viewed from any other perspective, however: that same downfall, could easily be interpreted as the beginnings of a whole new career for Mojo Jojo, as a ‘superhero’ (and, what’s more, the very type of superhero this country is deperately crying out for, as we speak!)

Look at it this way. Despite his lack of any true ‘superpowers’, in the comic-book sense of the word – Mr Mojo Jojo did nonetheless possess a unique ability, that – to the best of my knowledge – no other supervillain (or superhero, for that matter) has ever been known to possess, before or since.

Actually, make that two unique abilities... no, wait: THREE.

1) The ability to recognise the TRUTH, when this is finally lain bare before his eyes;

2) The ability to instantly acknowledge HIS OWN RESPONSIBILITY, for a situation that had been directly caused BY HIS OWN ACTIONS; and lastly,

3) The ability to ACCEPT that responsibility... by simply bowing his head, and resigning himself to his ultimate DEFEAT, at the hands of his arch-enemies.

And here, I am tempted to add a fourth superpower: the ability to translate all of the above, into a single dramatic monologue that – were it not lifted from a children’s cartoon – could easily be mistaken for the final ‘crie-de-couer’, of a dying Bond-villain:

“WHAT? I created the Powerpuff Girls?  I am responsible for their birth? It was me, who caused them to be? I triggered the events, that led to them being on this earth? I dedicated my life, to destroying what I had a hand in creating? I created them! It’s all my fault! I did it! It was me! It was me! It was me...

... IT WAS ME!”

There, see what I mean? I’m half-tempted to nominate Mr Mojo Jojo for the ‘Gieh Ir-Repubblika’, on the strength of that one final speech, alone...

Meanwhile, however – just to illustrate how sorely lacking this form of ‘critical introspection’ has become, in today’s Malta – consider, for a moment, the following press release issued this week by the Malta Hotels and Restaurants Association (aka the MHRA: which also represents the collective interests of Malta’s tourism lobby, as a whole).

The statement begins: “Government should address a number of issues impacting the tourism industry, or else risk the country’s reputation as a holidaying destination...”

And among the MHRA’s listed concerns – apart from a few others I think we can all safely agree on: like, ‘Why has Malta become so disgustingly FILTHY, all of a sudden?’; ‘Why has our energy distribution system suddenly degenerated to (lower than) Third World standards?’, etc., etc. – there is the following little gem:

“[Another] area of concern is the activity related to road infrastructure by the public sector and the CONSTRUCTION PROJECTS [my emphasis] which together are turning Malta into a permanent construction site experience, creating gross inconveniences for both locals and tourists alike.”

Wait, there’s more. According to the MHRA: “Malta has reached a stage where no locality or street is spared from any construction activity causing noise, dust, and aesthetic pollution. No proper central coordination and management of such activity is in place leading to chaos and long queues of traffic everywhere, all the time. We need to take the bull by the horns as the situation in our streets is in a dire state and will do nothing but put off tourists and their families and friends from ever considering coming back again to our islands...”

Got that, folks? The Malta HOTELS (ahem!) and Restaurants Association appears to have finally woken up to a reality, that... well, pretty much everybody else has been complaining about, for years.

I.e., that ‘overdevelopment’ – coupled with the insufferable consequences of climate change – is slowly but surely transforming our island, from the potential Mediterranean jewel that it once was... into, quite literally, ‘an overbuilt, overpopulated, and badly mismanaged GARBAGE DUMP!’

So far, so good. I happen to agree with that assessment, entirely. At the same time, however... do I even need to go on? What’s entirely lacking, in that press release, is any correlative for Mr Mojo-Jojo’s candid, self-sacrificial ‘admission of responsibility’, above.

For instance: while the MHRA takes pains to point out that ‘roadworks’ are the sole responsibility of ‘the public sector’... it stops short of admitting that ‘construction projects’ (especially, a couple of truly GARGANTUAN ones, currently going up in a ‘tourist area’ near you) are overwhelmingly the prerogative of ‘private-sector’ entrepreneurs....

... of whom, the vast majority just happen to be active within the tourism industry, itself. In other words: most of those ‘development projects’, that the MHRA is suddenly so concerned about, are actually just new HOTELS, under construction... and the rest an assortment of, erm, RESTAURANTS; supermarkets, car-parks, entertainment establishments; and all sorts of other amenities used by TOURISTS, as well as locals.

Not to mention, of course, ‘apartment blocks, everywhere you look’ (many of which are now being rented, on short-lease, as ‘self-catering holiday flats’).

As far as I can make out, then: nearly ALL the ongoing overdevelopment, in this country right now, can be defined as being somehow ‘tourism-related’, in one way or another.

Yet does the MHRA ever acknowledge, in that statement, that this entire ‘building boom’ it now complains about (and which it tells us is ‘scaring precious tourists away’), was all along the result of the sheer greed, and rapaciousness, of some of its own members?

Does it ever pause to consider, that literally ALL the new development that has disfigured classic tourism hot-spots such as Xlendi, Marsalforn – and which now threatens to ruin Comino, and the Blue Lagoon – is literally down to the direct actions, of people involved in the very same tourism industry, that the MHRA represents?

Well... to be fair to at least SOME of its members: MHRA president Tony Zahra did seem conscious of it, when I interviewed him in September 2022.

In that interview, he explained the results of a (then-recently commissioned) Deloitte survey, which – in his own words - “took a snapshot of the availability of hotel-accommodation, going forward, if all the approved or pending applications [for new hotels] were to come onstream. And it emerges that – always assuming that all the pending applications will be approved; and that the developments themselves will actually be finalized – we will have more or less DOUBLE [my emphasis] the number of rooms, that we had in 2019.”

And when I specifically asked him, “[is] the tourism sector endangering its own future survival, by contributing to making Malta a less attractive destination for tourists?”, Mr Zahra replied: “This is a ‘chicken-and-egg’ situation, at the end of the day. Because you will only ever get the tourists, for the product that you have. And if you don’t have a quality product… you’re not going to get ‘quality tourists’. Simple as that, really…”

All things considered, then: I think it’s fair to say that the MHRA President, at least – if not the rest of the association – is aware of a direct causal link, between his own industry’s excesses, and the ongoing degradation of Malta’s tourism product (not to mention, the country as a whole).

Ah, but will we ever get an MHRA statement, saying:

“WHAT? WE created the issues, that now threaten to destroy our own industry? WE are responsible for the uglification of Malta: on whose beauty, our own livelihood depends? It was US, who caused all this litter, and all these overcrowded beaches? WE triggered the events, that led to tourists leaving the island in droves? WE created the problem! It’s all OUR fault! WE did it! It was us! It was us! It was...”

Erm... I guess not, huh? After all: for something like that, you need ‘superpowers’. And what we all know this country really needs, right now, is...

... you guessed it! Mr Mojo Jojo, from ‘The Powerpuff Girls’...