From heartache to happiness: our journey through adoption

Adoption is one of those instances where your decision has a massive impact on yourself, your family, and the child whose trajectory in life you will radically change

The author and his young child taking a walk in a park
The author and his young child taking a walk in a park

This father’s day was particularly special for me. Although my son is just shy of two years old, this was my first Father’s Day. Not all parents have the privilege of being present from day one for their children. In our case, our son joined our family 1 year after he was born - we were the lucky parents matched to adopt this beautiful and happy child.

Over the past years I've written about our journey through various personal events. As we descend down the slide of life, each of us deals with our own joys and struggles. I believe there is a lot to learn when we share our experiences with one another on our way towards that final silent splash.

As a couple, we have had the goal and desire to start a family since the very beginning of our relationship. As young adults, we aimed to start rearing in our late twenties. We always liked the idea of adopting a child, yet our original plan included a biological child. After several unfortunate miscarriages, we considered our next two options: IVF and adoption. We started both processes simultaneously but soon decided to focus solely on adoption - it felt like the right thing to do.

Fast forward a few years, and this has been the best choice we’ve ever made. We are now the proud parents of a young boy, who has brought immense love into our small family.

The process is not particularly difficult yet it is very long and entails a lot of waiting. You need to be prepared for a course, psychological evaluations, medical evaluations, and finally, the most distressing wait from match to actually meeting and taking custody of your child. I cannot downplay how anxiety-inducing this final wait is - you have to go on with your days knowing that your child wakes up each morning to carers who have too many kids to take care of. Somehow the process to bring the child home seems unpredictably postponed - you can do nothing but wait as those crucial weeks roll by at an agonising slow pace. The video calls do help but they also amplify the yearning for that first hug. This time was truly torturous despite the light at the end of the tunnel.

In life, several things simply happen to us, and most times we have no choice but to react to that which is thrown in our path. Adoption is one of those few instances where your decision has a massive impact - for yourself, your family and the child whose trajectory in life you will radically change. While there is beauty in the natural order of things, it is also profoundly beautiful to take the reins from an unjust world and steer towards a path of love.

We hope our story inspires others to explore the possibility of adoption. While we have just started our journey, it has already been a deeply fulfilling experience. I am certain that like it did with our family, it can offer you another path to happiness.