Colin Fitz: ‘I spend my free evenings watching classic 70s and 80s TV that reminds me of my childhood’

Colin Fitz is a broadcaster on 103.7 Campus FM, the University of Malta’s radio station, but is also known as a host of national events, and for appearing on stage in shows such as The Comedy Knights. He is due to play the Dame in the Adult Panto in June and has recently started hosting a series of musical events called ‘King of Retro.’

What’s the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?

As the 2009 song by Kesha says: “I wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy; before I leave: brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack...” Unfortunately, reality is more prosaic: I feed the cat and prepare my effervescent vitamin supplement.

What is the best advice you’ve ever received?

My dad used to emphasise the importance of always living within my means. Another bit of vital advice came from a book: you can’t bring people round to your point of view unless they are open to doing so. So, it’s not worth bothering if you’re a bit of chalk and they’re a bit of cheese... better to rip it up and start again with someone else.

What do you never leave the house without?

My underwear. And my (oh so ’80s!) Filofax.

Pick three words that describe yourself

Goody two-shoes.

What do you consider to be your greatest achievement?

Apart from joining Campus FM, it would be hosting the country’s most watched TV spectacle – ‘The Malta Eurovision Festival’. I used to watch presenters like John Demanuele, Charles Saliba and Ray Azzopardi hosting ‘The Song for Europe’ or ‘Wardakanta’ or ‘The Malta Song Festival’ as a child and once promised myself that I would be doing the same one day.

What is your guiltiest pleasure?

I spend my free evenings watching classic 70s and 80s TV programmes that remind me of my childhood rather than following the masses and seeking the next big series on Netflix. There has been the occasional modern series that has hooked me – such as ‘Manifest’ or ‘Person’ of Interest or the brilliant ‘Breaking Bad/Better Call Saul’, but most of the time you’ll find me seeking out grainy episodes of ‘The Professionals’, ‘The Persuaders’ or ‘The Sweeney’ on YouTube.

What is the most important lesson life has taught you?

First, that if you expect the world to be fair with you because you’re fair, then you’re fooling yourself. That’s like expecting the lion not to eat you because you didn’t eat him. Second, if people are given the slightest opportunity to claim more than they are entitled to, they will grab it.

Property and cars aside what’s the most expensive thing you’ve ever bought?

Well, if the classic car I bought purely for Sunday drives doesn’t count, then it would have to the two-week holiday I spent in the Dominican Republic.

What is one thing you wish you knew when you were younger?

Not to spread myself too thinly across multiple endeavours but to focus and specialise on just a couple of career paths.

Who’s your inspiration?

The historical figures I read about in my non-fiction collection, particularly World War Two military leaders such as Dwight Eisenhower and Hugh Dowding.

What has been your biggest challenge?

Finding, as Franco Battiato used to sing, ‘un centro di gravita permanente’...

If you weren’t a performer what would you be doing?

I’d probably be involved in a Geography-related job since it was one of my favourite subjects at school. In fact, I wanted to be a Weatherman as a child. That or a historian of the 20th century.

Do you believe in God?

Yes.

If you could have dinner with any person, dead or alive, who would it be?

This is a tough one as it’s hard to choose one person... it would be nice to have a romantic dinner date with a single Elizabeth Hurley... on the other hand, I would love to pick the brains of a historical figure like Hitler, Churchill or Dom Mintoff.

What’s your worst habit?

Eating between meals.

What are you like when you’re drunk?

Fun and talkative. But I am rarely drunk as I’ve never had much of a taste for alcohol.

Who would you have play you in a film?

Nicolas Cage. Or, if he was still alive, John Thaw. Or, and he is still alive, Martin Shaw.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Arrogance and narcissism.

What music would you have played at your funeral?

The theme from ‘Star Trek: The Next Generation’.

What is your most treasured material possession?

My classic Triumph sports car.

What is your earliest memory?

I have flashes of memory from the late ’70s when I was around three or four... I seem to remember sitting in front of a black and white TV set one evening while a TVM announcer, Edith Borg, read the news before an episode of ‘Noddy’. I also remember being in a car on St Andrew’s Road below the massive revolving radar antenna on Madliena Hill, and a Red Arrows aircraft flying low over my house circa 1978.

When did you last cry, and why?

When I read about that poor Turkish girl killed in Gzira. I cried for her and for her family, and I cried for us law-abiding citizens, quietly going about our business in a world that seems to have little interest in protecting us from bad, selfish people and bad practices.

Who would you most like to meet?

I once made a TV presenter who was interviewing me on his programme quite uncomfortable with this answer. Let me explain. Above, I told you that I believe in God. Now, according to the religion I was brought up believing in, everything that happens on this Earth is inconsequential, at least when compared to the eternity that is still to come. Therefore, I would love to, perhaps using a time machine, be able to meet Jesus, who is also God, but who lived as a man 2000 years ago. I mean... on a purely philosophical level, why bother meeting Hitler or Churchill or any mere man, when I am being given the opportunity, via your question, to meet ANYONE in history? Why not ask to meet the One who has the answer to everything?

What’s your favourite food?

Ravioli and Chicken Tikka Masala.

Who’s your favourite person on social media right now?

Jacqui Losco. Apart from being gorgeous, she has a fantastic sense of humour and doesn’t take herself too seriously. Her facial expressions and sense of fun are brilliant and come through even when she’s advertising clothes or whatever.

If you could travel in time, where would you go?

I love 20th Century history – especially the post-war era. I would love to witness at first hand, the major events that occurred in Western Europe between 1945 and 1999.

What book are you reading right now?

I’m currently switching between ‘Command’ by Al ‘The Pub Landlord’ Murray about World War Two; Ir-Re Borg, a satirical novel by Aleks Farrugia, and Charles Xuereb’s ‘Decolonising the Maltese Mind: In Search of Identity’. I went into that last one with a few reservations but I feel it’s important to be challenged and update your opinions if the assertions based on research in the book are convincing enough to do so.

If you could have any superpower, what would it be?

Shape-shifting.

What’s one thing you want to do before you die?

Have a hit record. Or present a TV documentary on the Discovery Channel.

What music are you listening to at the moment?

The soundtrack to the 2021 film ‘Annette’ performed by Sparks with Adam Driver, Marion Cotillard and Simon Helberg.

In the shower or when you’re working out, what do you sing/listen to?

My eclectic ‘mixtape’ featuring Alan Parsons, Devo, Classix Nouveaux, Gary Numan, Depeche Mode, Adam Ant, Rockets, Led Zeppelin, Bob Sinclair, Pink Floyd, Nirvana, Soft Cell, Level 42, Jeff Wayne, Mike Oldfield, Motorhead, Boney M, Armand van Helden, Ultravox, ABBA, KC and the Sunshine Band... should I go on?