Are we just gonna let the natural world continue to bully us into submission?!

The Skinny | No 16. Azure Window Replica Angst

The Azure Window mirrored steel replica proposed by Russian archi-star Svetozar Andreev
The Azure Window mirrored steel replica proposed by Russian archi-star Svetozar Andreev

What are we skinning? The Azure Window mirrored steel replica proposed by Russian archi-star Svetozar Andreev.

Why are we skinning it? Well… have you even seen the artist’s impressions?!

Yes, I have. It looks very flashy and impressive. Yes, flashy is the word. I can’t imagine even working up the courage to stare at it in summer.

You’re saying it’s ugly. Well, let’s not have that debate just yet. Eye of the beholder, and all that. Though speaking of eyes, I meant that quite literally: can you imagine the glare of the August sun violently ricocheting off that thing?!

It would make us all blind. Yeah, and Dwejra is hardly the flattest of surfaces to negotiate through, so impaired vision may be something to be factored into the programme, whichever way this goes.

I’m hoping it doesn’t really go anywhere. I mean, do we really need a replica? Can’t our brains do the work of remembering? You’d think so. That’s sort of what they’re for, right?

It’s also rather perverse. I mean, when a family member dies you visit them at their grave. You don’t hire an actor to impersonate them. You’ve also just described the plot to Yorgos Lanthimos’s ‘Alps’, which was indeed a disturbing experience. But let’s get back to the Window…

Actually, can we not? I’d rather talk about things that are either more urgent or more pleasant than the Frankenstein-like resurrection of one of our favourite landmarks… But ignorance and crass commercialisation must be faced head-on! Something of this kind will happen anyway, so why not dish out your own proposal?

Fine. I propose a monument dedicated to that indigenous insect species destroyed during the Game of Thrones shoot at the Azure Window. And a piñata-like row of dolls made in the likeness of dumb tourists who insisted on jumping off the Azure Window while was still ‘alive’. Bold choices. Where would you house them?

In an Augmented Reality interface accessible only via smartphone. I like it. Look away from the smartphone and see the ghostly legacy of the Azure Window in your mind’s eye, where it belongs.

Do say: “While the desire to commemorate the Azure Window should be accepted as a natural reaction to its loss, one should never  succumb to crass and tacky attempts to ‘resurrect’ it that fail to respect the natural context in which it was formerly housed.”

Don’t say: “Are we just gonna let the natural world continue to bully us into submission?! Let’s show the storms who’s boss and build the proudest and loudest replica ever!”