Gallows humour, cancel culture, woke-ism and the right to object to it all

I am not going to get into the content of Bajd u Bejken and their type of humour. I’ve already written about them before and will say it again – their style is a matter of taste and you can take it or leave it. What I will say is that with humour which gets attention for pushing the boundaries, one has to keep becoming more and more audacious for continued public outrage/attention (and clicks). And let’s face it, it works.

However, with the latest gallows humour about the notorious case of a little boy named Twanny (who was brutally murdered by his own mother Giga), even those who claim they used to enjoy this podcast felt this was a step too far.  The blind fury, which went viral (over something which happened 65 years ago) swept the Ukraine, Russia, Putin, Trump, Gaza and anything else of real consequence completely off the Maltese social media feed. I can understand the reaction. This story and the gruesome details have been repeated so many times, the name Giga still sends shivers down one’s spine.

Now, I’m not going to pretend I have never laughed at similar black humour in the past when I’m with friends – I’m not a hypocrite. So, why do we laugh? Because it is shocking, and although we  gasp even as we hear it, it tickles something in our funny bone due to the absurdity and inappropriateness of the whole thing. It’s like when you are gripped by hysterical laughter at a funeral or other sombre settings.

One classic example happened to me in the middle of the night when my father was on his death bed, in a coma in the hospital, and I got a fit of the giggles because the patients around him were all passing gas. The more I knew I should not be laughing, the more I could not stop, no matter how much I tried. I just kept imagining my Dad, despite being in a coma, hearing my muffled laughter and inwardly swearing at the fact that I was laughing: “You know what Jo, I’m dying here, do you think this is FUNNY?” To this day, 33 years later, I can still picture that scenario, that very moment, and I still laugh (sorry, Dad). The truth is that laughter can be a great release from carrying around a heavy heart, and yes, even from grief.

On the other hand, I will make the argument that when it comes to humour for public consumption, a podcast or a stand up comedian who “goes there” always runs a risk in equal measures of loud raucous approval for being so “daring” and downright opprobrium for crossing the line. This is what has happened now, with calls for the podcast to be banned, taken down and so on. The thing is this; the Internet does not fall under any authority. It is the one space which is unfettered and free (so far) which is why all sorts of content is accessible, including the most horrific, unspeakable things done to children which, despite being illegal, still lurk in the deepest, darkest corners of the web. The only online content you can control is if you are a parent and you restrict access to what your kids watch, and that responsibly falls squarely on you.

By nature I am against censorship, especially when it comes to content which you can choose to watch/listen to, or simply ignore. I am not going to watch a podcast or a TV programme for that matter, only to spend hours banging away at my keyboard describing why it is ‘shameful’ and why it should be taken off the air. Just turn it off. The tendency to automatically demand a ban is a knee-jerk reaction (fuelled by social media) which has become known as cancel culture. Basically, this is the belief that if I don’t like something or find it offensive, no one else can like it, which has now taken things to the other extreme.  On a global scale, this has led to many people in the entertainment industry suddenly finding themselves ostracised and out of work as they become untouchables and no one will hire them.

It is also the reason that being ‘woke’ has led to a major counter-movement which political pundits agree was one of the reasons Trump found a large enough base to get re-elected. What started off as a legitimate call against social injustice and discrimination turned into a bizarre free-for-all where the essence of woke-ism was lost because a few people took it to ridiculous lengths. The right to “identify as……..” (fill in the blank) was so exaggerated that the Right pounced on it with glee, and turned it into their main platform describing anyone who uttered the word “woke” as the ‘loony Left”.

Although my politics are firmly left-wing even I became highly irritated when it was being shoved in our face at every turn, with TV shows going out of their way to insert binary, gender fluid and all sorts of other “characters” in their cast just to make a point.  It is unrealistic, unnecessary and has the completely opposite (detrimental) effect on the ordinary, middle-of-the-road viewer.

It also irks me that when people object (as they have the right to) to jokes or content which go too far, the counter-reaction is sneering and contempt. The favourite put down, is “ok, Boomer”, referring to people aged over 60 who are dismissed as being antiquated, old-fashioned, completely out-of-touch and who just “don’t get it”.  To which I say, “Objection, your Honour!”

Ridiculing an entire generation for having an opinion is not only unfair, it is also (again I repeat myself) the antithesis of being liberal-minded. In the case of the Twanny joke, it just so happens that it was not only Boomers who winced and raised their voices, but those who are much younger as well. Gallows humour (like any humour) is a take it or leave it option, but if one is going to resort to it to create a stir, then one has to be ‘man’ enough to take any adverse reaction on the chin. Insulting those who don’t like it is just plain immature. Of course, it has also not gone unnoticed that this whole furore has created a Streisand effect and those who had never heard of BUB (as they are known) are now tuning in.

I feel it is high time everyone takes a step back and just breathes, so that we can at least try to reach some sort of calm, rational approach – whether it is in the way we disagree online or in person. We do not always need to win the argument; we do not always need to be right. It’s a free country (so far) so sure, let us all exercise our freedom by airing our opinions but, more importantly, maybe we should all talk less and listen more.

Who knows, maybe the day will come when we might even see things from another person’s point of view.