If 'Seven Layer Necklace' isn't the title for our next Eurovision entry, we may as well just pack it all in for good
No. 215 - Weighty and Light
What are we skinning? Michelle Muscat, the wife of Malta's former prime minister Joseph Muscat, trying on the Guiness Record-breaking 'Satlada Necklace' - aka the 'Seven-Layer Necklace' by Shiv Narayan, and posting a rapidly-gone-viral video about the experience.
Why are we skinning it? Mainly because it gained quick traction and spread like legit wildfire during a political season that was hardly free of scandal either way. But there's also a more fundamental - and perhaps more immediate - reason.
What would that be? Well, the Labour Party, to whom Michelle Muscat remains inevitably - albeit now somewhat distantly - tied, is supposed to advocate for both values and aesthetics that run precisely counter to the notion of posing with fancy jewellery and making a big deal out of it.
Ah, come on! The era of the Communist Manifesto is long gone. Sure, but also, that's quite a leapfrog on the opposite direction. There's nuances to this which can't be missed.
Nuances... or would that be layers? Michelle's got the makings of a seventh something, alright?
But what was the big issue with her online video? A lot of the reaction does come down to unedifying comments on her accent and whathaveyou, but this kind of thing just looks tactless no matter which way you slice it.
How so? Speaking straight to camera, Muscat described the piece of jewellery in question as being both weighty and light at the same time, and that "it's so shiny and making you feel special".
Look, everyone is going ga-ga over the David Beckham Netflix documentary. How is that relevant?
Well, that's also a piece of audiovisual content which seems geared towards eliciting sympathy and relatability from a pair of people who otherwise exist in a highly-rarefied sphere of existence. But therein lies the difference: genuine or not, the Beckham doc at least does a fine enough job of convincing you that Posh & Becks are human enough to connect with on a basic level... to say nothing of their innate charisma and - crucially - a healthy pinch of self-deprecating humour.
Still, that doesn't mean we should shame anyone whose social media prowess fails to meet that standard. Certainly not. But one would think that someone from the Muscat clan - renowned for their media-savvy - would think twice about posting a video which projects a jarring sense of affluence and only lends further fuel to the fire of her harshest critics.
I'm glad she's still managed to retain her smile. It's a lesson, for sure.
What kind of lesson do you think Michelle Muscat can impart with this lecture? That we need to find happiness in the simple things. You know, like necklaces which likely cost as much as a small island in the Pacific.
Oh, imagine the videos she would post from said island. I'm good, thanks.
Do say: Yes, of course Michelle Muscat has every right to post videos of her trying on fancy jewellery on social media. But by the same token - and given the contextual realities of the part she played in Maltese political history - we too have a right to point at just how jarring that spectacle may seem.
Don't say: If 'Seven Layer Necklace' isn't the title for our next Eurovision entry, we may as well just pack it all in for good.